Good to Talk · Helping a mate · Free. Always.
Helping someone you care about
Need urgent help now?
If you or someone else is in immediate danger, call 999 or go to A&E. If you need urgent mental-health help but it is not an emergency, in England call NHS 111 and select the mental-health option or use NHS 111 online where appropriate.
You do not need to diagnose somebody, fix them or have all the right words. Notice. Ask. Listen. Stay involved. Get proper help when it is needed.
If you're worried about suicide, ask directly.
Clear, compassionate questions are better than hinting around the subject. If there is immediate danger, call 999 or go to A&E.
Your mate doesn't need you to be a therapistHe needs you to notice, ask, listen and help him get the right support when he needs it.When something just seems offThere is no single look of poor mental health.Ask twice when you need to“You alright?” “Yeah.Useful words when you don't know what to sayYou don't need a perfect speech.Good intentions can still land badlyMost people say the wrong thing because they desperately want the other person to feel better.What do I do now?Believe that he is struggling, listen, and help him take an appropriate next step.Yes — you can ask directlyIf you're worried somebody may be suicidal, it is okay to ask plainly.Take it seriouslyYou do not need to decide whether they “really mean it”.When to take concern seriouslyThere is no perfect checklist and people do not always show obvious warning signs.Where to turn when it cannot waitIf somebody needs urgent mental-health help, you do not have to work out the entire system yourself.Make the plan before the crisisWhen somebody is overwhelmed, remembering phone numbers, names and sensible next steps becomes much harder.Turn 'you should see someone' into actual helpWhen somebody is struggling, a two-minute admin task can feel enormous.Be their partner, not their clinicianLove can be enormous support.Check on dads tooNew dads and experienced dads can struggle while everybody understandably asks how the baby, kids or partner are doing.You don't have to make grief betterYou cannot fix the fact that somebody died.Help without feeding the anxietyReassurance can feel helpful in the moment, but endlessly proving that every feared outcome will not happen can sometimes become part of the cycle.Small things can matterDepression can make ordinary tasks feel disproportionately difficult and can convince somebody that they are a burden.You can't force every decision — but safety changes thingsWatching somebody struggle while refusing help is frightening and frustrating.You matter in this as wellSupporting somebody through serious mental-health problems can be exhausting, frightening and emotionally heavy.What happens after the immediate danger passes?A crisis ending does not necessarily mean everything is fixed.Don't assume somebody else will deal with itA worrying post, message or story can leave you wondering whether you are overreacting.When somebody at work isn't themselvesYou do not need to be their manager to ask if they are okay.When home tells you something isn't rightFamilies often notice change before the person is ready to describe it.Don't brush that sentence offStatements about being a burden, disappearing, death or everybody being better off without them deserve a direct follow-up.
Useful next pages
Trusted help & further reading
- NHS — where to get urgent help for mental health
- NHS Every Mind Matters — helping others
- Samaritans — if you're worried about someone else
This section is practical guidance, not emergency or clinical care. If somebody's safety is at immediate risk, use emergency services.